BAD CHANGE!

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Hey guys!!!
Hope you all are doing well, better than ME at least!!

Soooooo, I'm in the dungeon...(work internship)...SUPPOSED to be writing a story, but I'm not. Why?

....'cause I don't feel like it.
Every time the door opens I look over this big bulky Mac computer to see if my editor/supervisor is off from lunch yet. When I see her come through the door, I feel like a marshmallow left on the sidewalk in 101 degree weather....then after I'm melted, some stray dog licks me off the sidewalk. I feel defeated, tired, used....and sticky.

As much as I love writing....newspaper IS NOT FOR ME...if I can't write like how I write in my blog. Take it or leave it. Love it or hate it...and any other similar cliches.

Now, I've noticed, I never really have a "topic" for my blogs...and hell, I like it like that, butttttttt '09 is time for change...lol (I laugh because that word means nothing to me...I mean it does, but I rarely stick to what I promised myself...[HENCE MY LACK OF ENTHUSIASM WHEN IT COMES TO MY NEW YEARS RESOLUTION])

Anyway, don't you hate it when....
People change toward you, but it's the BAD kind?
Change could be good or bad...
Like drugs....you have the ones you get hooked and dependent on and they basically run your life, then there are the bad ones.

So a little story about what happened a few MINUTES before I checked into depression central.

-PAUSE!-
Soooooo one of my co-workers[ugh] just told me that the phones are down..YAY!!! which means....I don't get to do any interviews over the phone today!

-PLAY-

BAD CHANGE!
So there I was walking into Starbucks, and I see this person. We were friends once upon a time in a land far away when a purple princess lived in a castle with a mean dragon. But a recent dash of hmmm...anyway for a lack of a better term..."fame" sprinkled on them. Apparently, "fame" comes with a head pump, free with every purchase. Because, why all of a sudden when you're "famous",I can't talk to you on the same level, because YOUR EGO and I are competing? Why all of a sudden, we aren't able to be in the same room, because YOUR EGO needs its own space, seat and glass of wine?

Now, I have nothing against people getting their successes, because hell, I'm trynna ride the train on the road of success, too. In fact, I'm trynna get my own Hybrid and drive on the road of success by myself with my GPS leading the way. (I'm all about going green)... Speaking of going green, THIS IS NOT JEALOUSY and I am not a [cringes] "HATER". But I digress.

But, forreal, why is your ego the size of the earth plus the fat they sucked out of Star Jones? (Her fat was shipped to Mars for feeding purposes). Anyway! Do me, the world and yourself a favor and follow these instructions to help you realize a VERY important fact of life........

WHEN YOU TAKE A DUMP:
1)Wipe...why?..Because it's hygienic!
2)Face the toilet...
3)Get on your knees...
4)Put your head in the bowl (Make sure your nose is about an inch away from the water)
5)DROWN YOURSELF!..lol I kid...
6)Inhale DEEP.

What happened?
Now, unless you're from Pluto where their doo doo smells like roses and vanilla, it SHOULD and DOES smell like a Hot Garbage meal with sweet and sour cesspit sauce. SO STOP ACTING LIKE YOU'RE FROM PLUTO!
STOP ACTING LIKE THEY BOTTLE YOUR GENITAL JUICE FOR PERFUME/COLOGNE!
STOP! STOP! STOP!
STOP ACTING LIKE YOU DESERVE TO TELL PEOPLE "Get off my stage!"...NO! You can't say it!

[by the way, you don't have to TOTALLY rule out number 5....just sayin'..]

LOL VENTED MUCH!?

-PAUSE-
My supervisor just pranced in with a big smile....
OH YAY!...She's too sleepy to give me work...
-break dancing in my smart casual work clothes and getting rug burns-

-PLAY-
Okay, another issue about change...
BAD CHANGE...
Do you know those people who are the tiny ugly ducklings in high school and after high school....

.....they become big, ugly swans, in looks AND personality?
I don't know about you guys, BUT...when people act like that, it makes my liver cry.
Having self confidence, whether you, in my opinion, resemble a bloated Flavor Flav or worse, is WAYYY different from having a bad attitude toward every human being and some puppies. Why do you always act like the world is against you, ESPECIALLY IF I WAS YOUR FRIEND?...
Boo boo, get it together or put a paper bag over your face....I mean attitude. You DO see people walking around with paper bags covering their attitudes right?? Lol if you say, "Yes", out loud no matter where you are right now would make me feel less mean...SO SCREAM "YES!"...now. I just did and got looks at the office. OH WELL!

But yeah, fix your attitude, if you can't fix your face.


WOOSAH! Venting is good!!

Nowwwwww for some funny things that happened to me this week...

Yesterday I was in Subways, ordering my usual: Meatball 6 inch on Italian, Herbs and Cheese bread, toasted, with just mayo. HERE IS HOW IT WENT...

-Carissa walks in with head phones singing "Radio" by Beyonce and walks up to the counter-
-"Sandwich Artist" as they prefer to be called, is on the phone...[I'm ready to freaking order]
Carissa: Hellooooo?
Sandwich artist: (to the person on the phone) I'll call you back I have a customer waitin'.
Carissa: Hey, can I have a 6 inch Meat ball sub on Italian, Herbs and Cheese bread (YES I HAD TO REPEAT IT, 'cause I love it!)
S.A.: Umm...ya' tongue pierced? [why are you asking me this???]
Carissa: Umm...yea.
S.A.: But you look like you still in school(high school)...
Carissa: Umm...okay? [SHE STILL HASN'T STARTED MAKING MY SANDWICH]
-S.A. turns and gets a wheat bread loaf-
Carissa: I said, Italian, Herbs and Cheese...
S.A.: Oh. -gets the right loaf- Sooooo you look so young..why ya tongue pierced?
Carissa: Toast the sandwich please...[yes, I ignored her]
S.A.: -puts sandwich in the toaster- Huh? Why you pierce it? [like I didn't hear her the first time?]
Carissa: Because I'm old enough....and I had nothing better to do..
S.A.: Mmmmmm...I still think you too young, you LOOK young.[WHY ARE WE TAKING ABOUT THIS?!?! A Sandwich artist's job is to PAINT MY SANDWICH WITH SQUIRTS OF MAYO AND MUSTARD and add little 3D pieces like tomatoes, lettuce etc...WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT HOW YOUNG I LOOK...MAKE MY DAMN SANDWICH!]
-Carissa is about to tell the S.A. what to put on the sandwich when some random dude comes into Subway and begins to order cookies..from the door...-
Carissa: (ignoring the man) Just mayo....
Random guy: YA' LEMME GET SOME OATMEAL COOKIES PLEASE! [WHY DON'T WE WAIT?]
-Carissa and the random dude are talking at the same time by the way-
S.A.: We only have 1 oatmeal cookie...[I'm sorry, I wasn't ordering...]
Carissa: Yeah, can I have 3 Double Chocolate cookies with that, please?
Random Guy: Only 1 oatmeal?
S.A.: Yeah, we only have 1 oatmeal...
-She(S.A.) finally decides to take my order and cash me up-
-Carissa is heading out the door-
S.A.: (to Random guy) She look young, hey? She have her tongue pierced...
Random Guy: Oh ya?!...Soun' good to me, still.
-Carissa chuckles slightly on the way out of the restaurant-

If I didn't laugh I would have yelled at this ignorant woman. WHY IS MY TONGUE RING SO AMAZING? ANYWAYS....a whole OTHER topic, about people with these judgmental mindsets.


ANYWAYS Y'ALL PEACE!

By the way: I love Gnarls Barkley!! Like I have been jamming to their "The Odd Couple" album all week...and will be forever....

Peace,
Carissa

Oh yeah, question you guys, should I take my blog to Facebook, too? Let me know!

Email me: carissarhoblog@live.com
Questions, topics, concerns, ETC!

2 comments:

Mizz.Lianne said...

L0L! I don't think you should exploit your blogs to FB L0L.. Then again, more people would definitely read them, since everyone and their mother [literally] is on FB. Love reading your blogs btw! And I totally agree on the part where you said people experience 'bad change' when they get the least lil bit of looks, fame etc. I have too much of a personal experience with that - cough - Anyway.. keep it up! & Yeah, take it to FB! Cool to have your own official blog site too!

Sumtinta Sey said...

LMAO WHY SHE ALL IN YA MOUTH!!! Like fa real though....um...why she telling that weird oatmeal cookie eating man that???? lmao hilarious!